At the beginning of April, I posted a post about the best life lessons.
I wrote about how I would be turning 30 years old next year and hadn’t felt as though I had achieved much in life. Yes, I have achieved some things, very good things in fact, but I don’t feel like I have achieved all that I could have achieved. I’d found a list of 10 life lessons to learn before you turn 30 by Lifehack and added a couple of my own life lessons that I have learnt and that I believed were well worth learning in life. My opinions on those life lessons haven’t changed at all.
From a very young age, I knew that you can’t always get what you want. Let’s be honest, with my mom giving birth to my two younger siblings who share the same birthday when I was 5 years old and 7 years old, how could I have got everything I want? It’s safe to say that this has made me a lot more grateful for what I can get whenever I can get it. Money isn’t everything, it’s the memories and love that matter. If you have that, to me you’re the richest person in the world.
A big influence on my life that has shaped me the way I am today is friends turning their back on me. I’m not going to name anyone in particular as I don’t think it would be right to do that, but if you really know me and are reading this then you will know the experience that I’m talking about.
In short, I was friends with a girl from high school. Thanks to my fiancé, I finally had my voice back and I don’t think that she really liked that fact and in my opinion tried a lot to split us up. One day, she and another friend just turned completely against me after I didn’t reply to a text message. I didn’t have any credit on my phone and I was also in a class at my Sixth Form college, there was nothing I could do about it. We never spoke to each other again. I know that I have lost a lot of my old friends because of this experience but it has given me fresh eyes on the whole situation, and that situation wasn’t good.
You may think you know someone, but do you really? I know that I believed I knew my friend but in actual fact I honestly didn’t know her much at all. The whole experience also put into perspective other things that had happened which I never saw that way. However, thinking about them afterwards, it made me realise that a true friend would have been by my side instead of standing with the crowd that was terrorising me. OK, maybe that part needs more explaining.
In high school I was bullied.
Day 1 in my first year of high school in 1999 a boy a couple of years older than me started bullying me. I hadn’t done anything wrong and had never met him before but he took it upon himself to bully me. This bullying ended when he was caught bullying me by teachers after he had banged my head on the floor.
A few years later, in maybe 2003, I started to get prank calls to my mobile phone which then moved to my parents getting calls to the home phone saying that I was this and that and that I had to watch my back because they were after me. I had no idea who was behind it and had no idea how they got our phone numbers. My parents reported it to the school, but what could they do? It all came to a head when my parents received a call where they said that on the Friday after school they were going to be waiting for me and I had better look out.
Seeing as I’m being completely honest here, I was terrified. The person who was calling obviously knew me from school and were watching everything I was doing and I had no idea who was behind it. I asked my dad to pick me up that day because I was so terrified.
I walked out of the school gates to find the whole school waiting for me. I got in my dads car and he went into the school offices to report it all again and say what was going on. I was so scared I actually locked myself in the car. Everyone was still there but no-one had made a move. I turned around to look and I see the friend I’ve been talking about standing in with the crowd, not with me. The people who came to stay with me were a friend and someone I didn’t expect to, as we’d had arguments in the past. I appreciated them being there, but the person that I had expected would be there just wasn’t there for me.
Luckily, nothing happened but everyone was still there when my dad came back and we drove off.
Everything that has happened to me has taught me to appreciate the people who are actually there, not the people who pretend to be.
What life lessons have shaped you into the person you are today? Have you had any similar experiences? I’d love to hear from you!